2014-02-25 - Arguments and Yelling Matches
Tony leads the way in his lab. It's generally sound proof, and it's private, and no one to witness it. The is silent at first as he enters and the door locks behind Nat, before he finally says, "So, what was in the room was not only worth your life, but the sacrifice of an innocent life that you knew about in your womb as well? How do you think Steve would have felt having his death replaced with that of a child's?" "I wasn't /sure/ I was pregnant," Natasha argues. "And I /won't/ talk about it now, Tony. I can't." She actually looks shaky. "Maybe later. When I can. But understand me when I say describing it? I would rather be tortured. Reliving that? Yes, torture definitely is better." "No, you won't. It's a choice we make, of what we talk about and what we don't. What we trust people with and what we don't. It's a choice we make everyday, like Simon running off to tell Sawyer and disrespecting me, disrespecting Sawyer, and what we once had which he has /no/ idea on because he wasn't around for her death, for that year I mourned, or for her return to life." Tony turns to look at Natasha, "So you assume. And you knew you were with child, otherwise when I brought it up, you would have been shocked. You weren't," he states. "So, your life isn't your own anymore Natasha, it's not. When the child is born, you can be suicidal and stupid again without the child around, but don't make an innocent life suffer for your decisions or your regrets. I miss Steve, he was my best friend, but I would /not/ trade that child's life for Steve's, and he wouldn't want it." "Sometimes there are things we are called to do for a /greater/ good, Tony." Her lashes glint slightly, tears threatening for an instant to spill. But she blinks, and then Natasha regards him coldly. "This child is not above that any more than any other. Sometimes we must make hard choices. I made that one, and I would do so /again/. Believe me, one life, even two? Worth the cost." She stares at him. "Don't you speak to me of regrets, Stark. This had nothing to do with regret, and everything to do with doing the /right/ thing. Something you preach." She shrugs, withdrawing from him both physically and, from the way her face is sliding into an expressionless mask, emotionally as well. "Simon will be reminded of the faults in his actions." "You don't get it! We are to protect innocents, /not/ sacrifice them like lambs to the slaughter Nat! It's about standing for something, a higher ideal, not just about the fact it's my child or your child, it's an /innocent/ child that has done no wrong except exist because of a mistake other people made. That child isn't guilty of anything. How can you say that is the /right/ thing? You are so busy distrusting everyone, you don't know that there are those that would move mountains for you just because you asked them." "If the death of one innocent child would save the lives of a thousand other innocent children," Natasha snaps, "would you still be standing here telling me this?" "Yes! Because there is another way!" Tony is serious about that. "I could have bombed that damn room if it was so important to blow up. I could have done about hundred different ways to make sure no one got their hands on it. We didn't need it like the serum for you, there are tons of ways to make it disappear without risking innocent lives! Your way isn't always the best Nat, it's why we have a team, it's so people can work together for the best solution." "You, Fury... you'd not have bombed it. You both would have wanted it, for different reasons," Natasha says. "I could /not/ trust anyone with it. Power is compelling, even for people I would otherwise..." her fists clench. "/This/, Tony, /this/ is why the truth is /wrong/. People do not want it. They do not need it. They prefer their pretty little lies and assumptions. They like the fantasy world, and they fucking lash out when you strip it from them! I don't live in a fantasy world, Stark. I see /everything/, and that means all the darkness everyone else wants to pretend isn't there." One tear actually does streak down her cheek, and she swats at it angrily. "Your 'solution' may have blown the damn thing wide open, made it /worse/. I knew what had to be done. I /did/ it and I /will not/ apologize for it. There's your damned truth. I'm sick of honesty, Stark. All it gets is this. Let's just go back to lies and secrets, it's /safer/ that way." "No! Because when will the child get in the cross-fire again for the supposed 'greater good'?!" Tony slaps a table and turns away, to take a deep breath as he presses his palms on the table. "How can you expect me to trust you with the child Nat, to put the child first when this is how you think? When you don't let people in, don't let people /help/ you. I'm just thankful Jess went with you anyway though we almost lost her, because we would have lost you for sure if she haven't." Tony takes a deep breath and stands up to look back at Nat. "You /can/ trust me. I won't betray you. What is discussed between us stays between us, it doesn't go to anyone else. If you trust no one else Nat, trust /me/. I may get angry, I may rage at times, but I will never, /never/ betray you, /never/ sacrifice you, and /never/ see your life as anything but something beautiful and precious as well as the fact you care about other people. But if you can't put that child and yourself first, then you need to trust me to do it for you. Just as I trust you to punch me when I'm stupid, even if I'm annoyed you did it three bloody times, to look after me." Natasha turns, moving towards the little bedroom-- specifically towards the bathroom, turning on the tap, throwing cold water on her face a couple of times. Tony goes after Natasha, watches her for a bit. He doesn't say anything at first, before he finally says, "I got rid of the bar, installed bookshelves," he says quietly. "I'm also giving the penthouse to Pepper. Bought a house. America kinda damaged it, so thought...why not. Be easier to remodel then build from scratch. I want to show it to you, get your input on some of the remodeling, security features, child protect it...," Tony sighs. "I want to make this /work/, us work. And I know, I know I need to open up more, I need to trust you looking out for me, and I want it to be a two way street. I know you look down at yourself, I do the same, but there is something more important than both of us now in our lives, someone, that child. We are going to need to change, to adapt, and we...ah shit..." Tony moves further into the small room and hugs her from behind, burying his face against her hair. "We are going to raise our child together Nat, and I need your commitment to that." Natasha's shoulders quake slightly. And she turns, her face still damp, and buries in her face in Tony's chest. At least the noise of her crying is muffled. She hates herself for this, it's weakness. She doesn't say anything for a bit, then she nods, not moving her face from his chest. Tony wraps his strong arms about Nat and holds her snugly up against him. This isn't the first time he held her while she cried, and he never mentions it, never repeats it to anyone. He didn't say anything last time, but this time? This time he does whisper, "It's not just the child important to me, it's you too Nat. It wasn't just drunkeness that had me ask you not to leave me. It's because, that's what I really want, is for you to stay by my side and for us to do this together, as a team, as partners. So please...please, be my partner Nat. Yell at me when I risk my life stupidly, hide the liquor from me, we will survive it all." "If you ask James about what was down there," Natasha says finally, "I will /end/ you. He doesn't need to relive it. It will be harder for him than it is for me, it was more recent." So Bucky knew, whatever it was. "You promise me this, and after I tie up one last loose end? I will stay." "Depends on what that loose end is." Tony moves to pull away a bit to tilt Nat's face up. His own expression looks pained. He HATES seeing Nat cry. "I won't ask him, but what's this loose end? I thought you said you already handled it?" Natasha gives Tony a rueful look. "I need to talk to my husband about getting a divorce. I'm not going to move in with another man while I'm still married." There's almost a sadistic gleam in her eyes as she drops that information on him. "It may take a little bit to get the ... paperwork... handled." A pause, "What?" Screech crash? Actually, Tony wobbles...yes, WOBBLES! He definitely looks pale. "Do not worry about it, < darling >," Natasha reverts momentarily to Russian. "As I said, a simple loose end. Old paperwork issue. Part of a cover." She's not entirely truthful, but she's not exactly lying either. "I am sure when I get ahold of him, we can sort things out." Though, Natasha does begin leading Stark over to the bed to sit him down. In case the man falls over. She's not as strong as she used to be. "Hey, hey..wait...," Stark is still feeling light-headed! He wobbles along with Nat and almost falls on the bed as he sits down there. He swallows hard. "Oooohkay, well, I ummm...appreciate it, I admit, kinda want the kids surname to be Stark," he says a little weakly. Oh ya...he is..., "Wow...I think you are the first married woman I've laid. How about that?" "Agreed. I've looked into the legalities, if he and I are still married when the child is born, well..." Natasha shrugs. "Technically, the law considers the child his, even though it has been several years since I last saw him." She kisses Tony's cheek lightly. "Do not worry. I am sure he and I will come to an understanding." "Umm....hell no," Stark says. Yep, he might be plotting this guy’s death. "Ya...otherwise it be a dead understanding, on his part," Tony says dryly, and he JUST might be serious. It's...a little difficult to tell. "Ya...if I can't be nearby, take Jess," Tony says seriously. "She will have your back, you already know that." He is looking very serious at Nat. "And knowing your history...I'll fix your armor starting tonight," he states. Natasha chuckles darkly. "Do not worry," she repeats. "It will be handled. I already have things in motion to do so. I did not want to answer you about the... living... together... thing. Until I had it handled. But after this? I suppose I needed to give you the answer." "Still going to finish your armor, need you to come for a umm...resizing." He looks up toward the ceiling innocently. But then he says, "Well, it doesn't change who you are Nat, and we will get the job done, or...I'll buy it away." A pause, "I can't believe I offered to buy it away, sadly, I can actually do that unethical thing." Yes, yes he can. "But in either case, you are still you be it tonight or afterwards. And like I said, doesn't go out this door." Totally. Natasha lifts a brow at him, then settles in his lap. "I take it you've noticed," she says wryly. "I've been stealing your t-shirts to try and hide the... swelling." Her breasts had already grown a full damn cup size. She's not entirely happy. "But I've arranged backup when I go talk to him. Hawkeye. If there is any one person you can rely on to make sure I get out in one piece, you /know/ it's Clint." Stark's eyes get wide, "I've just been noticing how more and more beautiful you get each day!" He's really trying NOT to think of the married thing! Stark then snorts, "Yes, cause bringing your ex-lover verse your current-lover will totally smooth things over with the soon to be ex-husband." He rolls his eyes at that. "Totally. Well, do I have permission to speak to Clint about it?" He won't if Nat says no, which may surprise the woman. Natasha's expression tightens. "I'd rather you didn't," she says bluntly. "There's a few things I'd rather not have to interpret between the two of you. Besides, Clint's not exactly happy with me keeping the child," she points out. "He thinks it's a mistake, for both of us. He may not be entirely wrong, but worse mistakes have been made." A quiet hrm, "So if I randomly punch him repeatedly, I can't explain why, check," Tony says with a grin, but the grin isn't a happy expression. Oh boy is he pissed at Clint. But he then brushes her cheek with one thumb, "Let's get the scan, it only take a few seconds, then get some rest. I'll start on the armor and come join you later." Tony will still be there for Nat, will still hold her at night, but she may notice the sex stops until news of that divorce comes through. Tony does have a conscious. Damn it.